Whether you’re an Andro Air Max’ed weirdo with lanky locks tucked under a beanie in 20°c + heat or that poor kid at school with the immigrant fringe (aka ‘The Russian Fringe’ in my schooldays) – hair is important.

I struggle with hairstyle. I always stand outside the hairdresser shop feeling incredibly awkward. Anything could happen. You walk in and immediately get pounced by some saccharine sweet crazy blonde called Chanelle who gives you a coffee and REALLY wants to know what you’re doing later…couple snips of the scissors later and you’re lying in the ball on the pavement outside with a ginger Toni & Guy mullet and wondering what the hell happened.

Here’s a couple of people who shared the experience:

Hey world, give this guy a break. Supreme et al spectacularly messed the whole fitted/snapback/5 panel hat game up and prices soared. He just used what the big boss calls ‘initiative’ and when he runs up the Tube escalators his hat stays right on his head. Who’s laughing now?

Kids-Funny-Hairstyle-london-bridge

Don’t know why you’re looking so happy kid. That ain’t London Bridge, Manhattan Bridge or any bridge. It’s a depressing mess that’s a disappointment to architecture, design, art, hairstyling and the rest.

Not really a style, just negligence. A mirror into the world of a man who just got caught down at the petrol station blowing air up his ass whilst drinking a chocolate Frijj milkshake.

I’m just gonna say one thing – koRn.

Hope you’re pleased with yourself.

Too many puns. Too many clever things to say. Won’t say anything at all except stop being an attention seeking blogworthy heaux. People with tomato heads do not get promotions and when they go to get a tooth removed the dentist accidentally gives them too much gas because it is just THAT annoying.

Lets be honest now. Half of us might as well just be done with it and wear a shower cap all day.

References

Ke$ha – didn’t really have weird hair …she was just weird all over

Rihanna – the red hair pandemic circa 2011-12

Lady Gaga – general swine worshipper

Coolio and he’s in jail now so go Figaro.

Jessie J – Romanian fringe